Friday, February 24, 2012

A Journey into Darkness: 4: Captain N

This is N.

I've been kind of holding off on talking about this guy because, Frank Quitely, he is weird. It's kind of hard to explain why a video game character is just so unsettling to me. But here's an excerpt of dialogue:

As they are now, my Pokémon cannot save all Pokémon...
The formula that can change the world is yet to be solved...
I require power... Power that will let everyone understand...
(He starts walking away.)
...I know what power it is I need.
...That of the legendary Pokémon that, together with a great hero, made this land of Unova... Zekrom!
I shall be your hero, Zekrom... and I shall befriend you!

I can't really make heads or tails of this guy because, on one hand, his intentions seem pure but he's also the leader Unova's Malevolent Agency of Destruction, Team Plasma. It's kind of nice to have a member of Team Plasma whose IQ ranges in the triple digits. However, whatever relief gained is immediately lost when N shows up soliloquizing like Orson Wells on the most epic of heroin binges.

There is one conversation in particular that just blew my mind...

In what I assume constitutes an AMBER alert, N made me ride a Ferris Wheel with him. After I asked him if he ever coached at Penn State, two Team Plasma grunts showed up ready to battle. N (with utmost contempt for clarity, using as many pronouns as humanly possible) explained that "they" were recruited to help "us" protect Pokemon and that "he" will battle "them" to facilitate "their" escape.

Then as though he sensed the extremity of my furrowed brow, N had the audacity to ask, "Do you follow my logic? [yes/no]"

No, I do not! And yes, I will be spending the next week getting my fourth Prestige in Modern Warfare 3!


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